While being in vigorous programs like my doctorate program, you just kinda put your head down and charge through it, knowing that if you take the time to look up and try to figure out where you are, you'll either fall behind, or something will hit you in the head. Keep your head down! After doing that for so long, you get in the habit of keeping your head down, hoping it will all be over soon. After graduation, I don't think the habit had yet worn off. This past couple weeks I've finally stopped once in a while, looked around, and thought, "Hey, I'm not in school anymore. I'm actually working...for money. This is fun." It's been quite nice. Unfortunately I can't say that the process is complete and I've figured out this whole, being a grown up thing, but I'm getting closer all the time. When putting life on hold for 3 years to go through grad school, I've put everything else on hold. Since graduation, it's taken a few months to restart everything that was put on hold and figure out what plates are teetering helplessly in the air, about to fall, and need some lovin' to stay spinning. I think I've just about figured that out and things are working smoothly again. And you know something that's weird - I finally started sleeping full nights again for the first time in a long time. I'm falling into a nice little rhythm and currently loving life. As long as I don't look at my student loan balance, I think that this feeling might last.
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